


Hormone high idiots yeeting pplz

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: stupid, yeeting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-05
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-10-10 08:23:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20524934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: This might just be a crackfic or something... I'm improvising...





	Hormone high idiots yeeting pplz

**Author's Note:**

> INSPIRED BY THIS RANDOM POST THREAD ON TUMBLR BY SOME OF MY FAVORITE FIC WRITERS PARSPICLE AND MUTATED BUNNIES HHHHH

I was perfectly fine with my life. On my own. Without other, incredulously stupid, people running around and being annoying. But nope that’s not happening anytime soon is it? No. One person made sure of that. They made it their life’s sole purpose to oppose my relatively peaceful state of existence. Of course. Why not. Why the fuck not. I mean, I guess it was partially my fault for consenting to this humiliating venture, but my twin brother had basically forced me into submission with the power of his infamous sad-puppy-dog eyes.  
“So you share a dorm room with your brother?” I sigh. “How do you stand living with your sibling?! Do one of you cook or do you both just live off of junk food? So are you the more responsible sibling or what? You look like the fussy mom type.”  
“Yes to the first question. I’m the cook and yes we can get along fine thanks. For the third one, my brother and I are literally the same age. He’s not a baby. I choose not to take offense at the last statement.“ I don’t mention that my brother’s technically older than me by an entirety of an astonishing eighteen minutes. Nobody cares about an age gap of eighteen minutes. Nobody.  
“Huh. He kind of acts a bit…younger,” This guy is really starting to get on my nerves… “Then again,” he quickly adds. “Blueberry exists too so…” I had to laugh at that one.  
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Plus, this date thing was just a one-time thing. It could be kind of fun to expand my social circle, which was pretty much just the “minions” in my “evil cheer cult” according to certain Error. I find myself enjoying Ink’s company more than I was willing to admit, just like Dream predicted. Maybe not on a romantic level, but he was, frankly, fun to hang around. He’s so controversial and offensive, it’s like his existence itself is inappropriate.  
“Yeah you probably shouldn’t let Blue hear you say that…”  
“Or what? I’m pretty sure I’m like immortal. He’s got nothing on me.” Okay I know I’m supposed to be edgy emo and everything but you couldn’t expect me to hold back the snort from that. Contrary to what was apparently popular belief, you can be edgy emo and laugh at stupid things. Or snort.  
Ink didn’t seem to think so though, and I found him staring at me in a poorly concealed expression of disbelief. I swear his mouth was gaping.  
“I actually cannot believe you just made that noise.” He informs me. I make a face. “I cannot believe you were capable of making a noise like that. Holy shit the Darkness Overlord just fricking snorted. Oh my gosh you’re blushing.” That stupid nickname had originated from Error, who still couldn’t believe that I had made the cheer squad at all, not to mention as the cheer captain. I’ll have to remind myself to murder him later. Also, I take back everything good I have ever remotely associated with Ink. What did I think would happen on a frikkin date with the delirious art/band-flutist kid? One that holds no recognition of personal boundaries whatsoever. If I had my goopy form right now, I would definitely have strangled him. As it was, we stayed in this incredibly awkward moment way too long before he decidedly took my face in his hands and placed his mouth on mine, pulling away a second later with a smirk on his face.  
I, the cheer captain, was just kissed by the artsy band nerd. This was my first fucking kiss goddammit, and all I could do was incomprehensibly curse him out, quietly as to not disturb all the other customers in the store, as he started laughing uncontrollably. There was something seriously wrong with this guy. Seriously wrong. I could practically feel the eyes on us.  
“What are you doing?!” I hiss through my teeth, careful not to stutter. “Do you know what the word ‘consent’ means? We are in fucking public!” There was no way I’m telling him that this was my first fucking kiss. Just like how he’s never going to know that this was my first date. “Are you not familiar with the concept of shame? Why the fuck would you do that?”  
“Bold of you to assume that I need reasons to do things.” He raises an eyebrow from across the table. I want, so badly, to wipe that smug little grin off of this guy’s face. “But I guess I just wanted to see how hard you could blush.” How was he being so nonchalant about this? He was an arrogant, smartass, condescending dickhead, who has no respect for anyone whatsoever.  
Dream really wasn’t lying when he said Ink was my type.  
“Oh, before I forget, you, Night, absolutely suck at kissing,” I practically growl at that.  
“It’s not like you even gave any warning! How the fuck are you able to tell how good someone is within literally one second anyway?” He brushes his dirty blonde hair out of his eyes, before taking a sip of his tapioca milk tea and choking. His eyes widened.  
“Wait.” Cough. “Was that your first fucking kiss?!” Wheeze. How the frick was he so good at reading people? Is he some kind of deity?! “Oh my gosh I knew you were pretty antisocial aside from your gang but like, you’re the literal cheer captain and you had your first kiss taken on a date with the crazy flutist art kid?” I glare at him, ignoring the blood I could definitely feel rushing onto my cheeks. For some goddamn reason, my dark skin does absolutely nothing to make my flushing less visible. If the smirk on his face were any indicator, Ink was aware of this fact as well. It was useless to hope that he would mistake it for anger, and I chose not to lie to myself. Hope cannot be crushed if it doesn’t exist. Haha. “It’s like all of life’s corny stereotypes were yeeted out the window! And life is made of corny stereotypes…” I’m sure that if this had been a movie, this would’ve been the part where the antagonist gets the malevolent glint in their eye (or just light bouncing off their glasses; it varies according to the situation). He looked me in the eye, a funny expression on his face, his face tilted in a way that told me not to trust him.  
“Does that mean that…Everything is now available for yeeting?” Oh no oh no oh no oh nonononononono oh shi-


End file.
